Raped
by igobacktoblack
Summary: Rachel Berry was raped and decide to move to New York. She was traumatized. But she met Finn Hudson and everything changed.
1. New Beginning

**Raped.**

Rachel Berry was raped and decide to move to New York. She was traumatized. But she met Finn Hudson and everything changed.

_**I don't own any characters. They belong to Ryan Murphy and FOX.**_

**Chapter 1: New Beginning.**

**Rachel's POV**

I was lost.

Worse than that. I was afraid. Of everything and everyone.

Let me introduce myself. I'm Rachel Berry and I was raped. It happened 5 months ago. I was in my hometown, in Los Angeles. I lived with a friend, Mercedes, we were actress and trying to do something big, meanwhile we sang in bars for living.

But in a Friday night, when we got back home, after a little show, one man assaulted us, he put a gun against my head and made me open the door, we thought he just wanted to steal, but he raped us. It was horrible, he was tough and it hurt. So badly.

Fortunately, we could saw his face and when we went to the police station, I found out we weren't the only victims, the rapist made 10 another, with our help, we manage to catch the son of a bitch.

His name was Jesse St. James. And he was gorgeous, actually. But what he did to _me_, to all those women, it was unforgivable.

He was sentenced to a death penalty. Mercedes moved to New Jersey, to her parents' house, days after the trial, but I stick around and watched his execution. It made me feel a little better, but I was traumatized. I didn't speak to anyone, I only left home to work in bars or to go to groceries.

But I knew it was done, in the second that Jesse died, I made a decision.

I needed to move on, I couldn't live in LA anymore. But I didn't have a family. My 2 dads were dead, in a car accident 1 month after the rape and my mom abandoned me when I was a baby.

So I would start all over.

I sold everything, my house (Mercedes paid rent), furniture. In the end, I had a good money, so I flew to NYC and search for an loft.

I went to the 5th Avenue and found one building, a good one. In the Upper East Side. I bought the loft in the last floor. It took me a few days to buy all the furniture. I used a part of the money that my dads left for me. _(Her dads were rich. Really rich, but she didn't use their money while lived in LA – while the two were alive.)_

It was the first Monday after I moved when I decided to audition to a musical on Broadway. It was a small one, but it was a beginning.

When I arrived, it had 20 people in a line. When I saw that, I wanted to leave, I mean.. I couldn't win everyone. I was good, not _that_ good. I turned to leave and bumped in something big.

"Sorry." The thing said.

I looked up. It wasn't a _thing_, it was a boy. A really _big_ boy.

"No, no. I'm sorry."

"Are you going to audition?"

I shook my head.

"No, I was.." I sighed "I planned to audition, but I'm not too good, so I won't waste my time."

"Hey, you're good!"

"How do you know? You didn't even hear me sing. Or saw act. Or do anything." I crossed my arms, in defense.

"Whoa, scary stranger." He raised his eyebrows "If you are here, you must be good. That's what I'm saying."

"Oh, sorry."

"I get it, you're nervous. It's your first audition here?"

"Yes."

"Oh, that's it. Don't worry, you'll be fine."

I faked a smile. I was shocked, it's been a while since the last time I talked to someone for that long.

"I'm Finn." He hold out his hand.

I looked at his face and his hand. He realized I wouldn't do that and put his hand in his pocket.

"I'm Rachel."

"Nice to meet you."

I nodded and turned around. I was nervous, really nervous. He was making me nervous. And I didn't like it. Actually I didn't like being around anyone, especially boys.

The security opened the door and we got in. I sat alone, far from everyone. But then, Finn showed up.

"Can I sit here?" he pointed to the next to mine.

I shrugged and he sits.

"Am I bothering you?"

I took a deep breath, but didn't answer.

"Ok. I get it." He mumbled. "Sorry."

I felt really bad, he wasn't hurting me, but it was so difficult to do.. anything with anyone. I was used to do everything alone. _Rachel Berry was lonely, very lonely._

"Let's begin." The director was on stage, smiling. "I thought it would be fair if everyone participate. You know, meet the contestants, seeing 'em as threats. So **you** make an effort, show me you really want to be a part of this."

Almost everyone in the room performed before me, and I had to say: they sucked.

Then, he pointed to Finn and said:

"Your turn."

I don't know why I did that, but I put my hand in his shoulder, making him turn to me.

"Break a leg."

He smiled and got up.

"Thanks."

I watched him walking to the stage and stood in the center.

"What's your name and which song you'll sing?"

"My name is Finn Hudson and I'll sing Can't Fight This Feeling."

The director nodded and the song started. When he began to sing, I was speechless. I've never heard anyone so good like him. He looked at me during the song and smiled again.

And I wasn't scare when our eyes met, I felt _safe_. I didn't know how he did it.

After him, it was my turn, he murmured a "break a leg" when he passed by my side.

"What's your name, young lady?"

"Rachel. Rachel Berry."

"Which song you'll sing?"

"Defying Gravity."

"Great song, go on."

I sang and everyone looked surprised.

"Whoa. That was so good. Congratulations."

"Thanks."

I went down the stairs and everybody got up.

"Tomorrow at 10, we'll post the list. Outside. Thanks."

I nodded and went to the door.

"Hey!" I heard someone call.

I turned to face it and it was Finn.

"What?"

"I wanted to say… you're the best singer I've ever heard."

"Oh. Thank you." I blushed.

"Well, I'm sure you got the part, but good luck anyway."

"Thanks. Good luck for you too. Bye." I waved and left.

It was a good audition and I was confident I mean, it'd be awesome if I got it, I needed the job. Soon.

And I had a feeling that my life would change. Didn't know to say if it would change for the better.


	2. Author's note

**Author's little note.**

Well, I'll go back to school tomorrow (I don't live in US or Europe, fyi.), so I hope you can be a little patient with the new chapters. I'm writing, I always do, but I won't post every day, but as soon as possible, I'll post it, I promise.

And I wanna thank you all for the story alerts, favorite story, author alert, author favorite, it means so much to me! Thanks *-*

See you soon, xoxo. **M.**


	3. Co Stars

**Rachel's POV.**

I woke up early to make my routine. Eat some fruits and drink my vitamin, then go to the building's gym. It was 10 am when I decided to go to the theater, the list was posted, I was sure.

But I didn't have a car, so I walked, it was near anyway. When I got there, Finn was looking at the list.

"So, you got it?"

He turned around and smiled.

"Oh, Rachel. You scared me. But.. yes, I got the part."

"Which one?"

"The protagonist."

"Congratulations, you deserve it. You're a great singer."

He blushed. So cute! Wait.. he as a boy. Boys weren't cute. _At all._

"Well.." I cleaned my throat. "If you excuse me, I have to see if I got a part."

"You are the protagonist too."

"Are you serious?" my mouth was hanging open.

"Yeah, co-star." He laughed. "I knew you would get it. I mean.. you're _really_ good! Your voice.. touches me. And I'm sure everyone was touched too."

"Stop it. You don't mean it." I blushed.

"I meant it, you're really good Rachel. I'm happy for us."

"Yeah, me too."

"Well.. I gotta go. I have to work."

"You work? Where?"

"In one restaurant. It's my dad's. I don't like very much to work there, but I made a deal with him, I'd work for him until I got one job. So that's my last day."

"Oh, I understand."

"If you wanna go there sometime, let me know."

"Okay."

He waved and turned around, I watched him leave and closed my eyes. He made me feel different, I didn't know how he did it. It was a _good_ different and that scared me.

_Too much._

**2 weeks later.**

It was the first day of rehearsals and I was really excited. 2 weeks in NYC without job was fun sometimes, I could visit some places I wanted to. Statue of Liberty, Central Park... besides, I saw a lot of musicals on Broadway.

I went to the theater early and met some people; everybody was thrilled, just like me. It was good to work with people who really want to make everything perfect.

I sit and one blond girl sits by my side.

"Are you Rachel Berry?" she asked.

I nodded and she held her hand out.

"I'm Quinn Fabray."

"Nice to meet you, Quinn." I shook her hand.

"I was looking forward to meet you."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I saw your audition. Your voice is amazing."

"Thanks." I blushed.

"So, I'll play Olivia, your best friend. I mean, Blair's."

I smiled.

"I hope we could get along."

"I'm sure we will." She nodded.

"Hey guys." Finn said when passed by the door.

He was going to play my other best friend, Gregory. And my "soul mate". The story was very simple. We were 3 best friends moving to Paris to start a new life. And there's a lot of songs. Somewhere in the middle of this new life, Greg and Blair fall in love.

I was nervous because I'd have to kiss Finn. It was just one kiss in the end. But I haven't kissed anyone since the rape, actually.

And I couldn't complaint, it was my first job in NYC and I was new in the business, I couldn't be a diva. And definitely, I wouldn't talk about Jesse and everything, these things were behind me.

"Hello, my beloved ones. I'm really happy; we'll start a new show, one of the best things that Broadway will see. So I want everybody to work with passion." The director, who called Ryan, said with a smirk on the face. "So.. break a leg!"

We spent the day rehearsing; fortunately, we did the songs and some scenes first. I knew it wouldn't take too long to practice _that_ scene, but until the time comes, I was fine.

We had 2 weeks to rehearsal, until the opening night.

Ryan dispensed us by the night, I was exhausted.

"Rach?" Quinn called me.

"Hey." I went towards her.

"Hm, the cast will go out for a dinner, to celebrate. Do you want to go^?"

A part of me wanted to say no, but I had to interact with them, I'd spend months with those people. So…

"Okay."

She smiled and Finn approach us.

"Hello ladies. Will you join us for the dinner?"

"Of course, Mr. Hudson." Quinn laughed.

Finn smirked and that bothered me. I shook my head and joined them.

We went to one restaurant and sit in one big table, I sat between Quinn and Finn and everybody had a great time. They were really nice. When almost everybody left, I went to outside and searched for a cab.

"Rach?"

I turned to face Finn.

"Hey. I thought you had gone home."

"Hm, I was in the bathroom."

"Oh."

"Where is your car?"

"I don't have one."

"You don't?" he frowned.

"No. I'll buy one, but the theater is near to my house, so.."

"Oh, we're pretty far now."

"Yes. I'm waiting for a cab."

"Do you want a ride?"

"Excuse me?"

"I live in Upper East Side, your house must be near."

"I live there too."

"Oh, I can take you, if you want."

I bit my lip, it would be the first time we'd be alone. Just us. I got a little nervous. But I needed a ride.

So I nodded.


	4. Maybe Friends?

When she agreed, I took my keys and we went to my car, I opened the door for her and she smiled.

Her smile was so beautiful. _She_ was so beautiful.

I went to the driver's side and opened my door, then I closed and we left.

She didn't say a word until I broke the silence.

"You can turn the radio on."

"Oh, ok."

She did it and the only voice we could hear came from the radio. Rachel was nervous, I could tell. I only saw her 3 times, but I felt like I knew her for years. She was really closed and shy.

I didn't care, I wanted to know her.

It took 10 minutes to pull over, her building was nice.

"Nice place."

"Thanks."

"My apartment is 2 blocks from here."

"Really?" She asked, surprised.

"Yeah."

The awkward silence came back. She cleaned her throat and said:

"So.. I have to go, see you tomorrow?"

"Sure."

"Okay. Bye Finn."

I waited for one kiss on the cheek or one touch, but it didn't come. She opened the door and took a shower. I was tired and needed a few hours of good sleep.

In the next morning, I went to the theater early, I saw Rachel and Quinn talking. The cast were cool, but those two were more.

We had a good cast, so everybody wanted to be there. The songs were perfect, so were the dance numbers. We'd kill this.

"We'll rehearsal now the Rachel's first solo." Ryan turned to her "it was perfect, don't get me wrong. I just want you to dance a little bit."

She nodded and the musicians started to play. Her solo was perfect, she had 3, but the first one was more emotive.

Her voice made me shudder and her moves were just lovely.

God, what was I thinking? In my 20 years of life, I've never felt this way. She moved me in some way I didn't know how to explain.

"Rachel, my darling, where have you been hiding? You're perfect! Great acting, perfect voice and you're stunning."

She blushed really hard and looked down.

"Now let's do Blair and Greg's duet. I wanna see love, chemistry. I know you got it."

I joined her on the stage.

"And remember: big kiss in the end."

Rachel choked and I looked at her.

"Excuse me, sr. Murphy?" she raised her hand.

"You can call me Ryan, Rachel."

She bit her lip and finally said:

"Well.. Ryan, I thought we only gonna kiss in the final."

"Yeah, but I changed my mind. I mean, after this duet, the tension is so big… they have to kiss, they need to. And after, you just stutter and run away."

"Okay." I nodded.

"But the rest.." she began.

"Baby, it's fine. If you read everything with this new kiss, it will make sense. Blair is nervous when Greg is around because she feels different."

"O-ok." She stuttered.

"You can stutter like that." He laughed.

I smiled and we prepared ourselves to the duet.

"One more thing."

We looked at Ryan.

"I don't like these technical kissed. They suck. I wanna see a real kiss, a real interaction."

"What?" I drowned.

"You'll kiss her. For real."

"Like… French kiss?"

"That's right."

"No way!" Rachel yelled.

"What?"

"I can't.. I just.. can't." then she ran away.

**Rachel's POV**

I ran to the bathroom and locked myself in there. I was shivering and crying, I felt like I was going to be raped again.

They couldn't do that, I couldn't kiss Finn.

There wasn't another option, I had to leave.

"Rachel?" I heard a knock on the door. "It's me, Finn."

"Go away." I said, between sobs.

"No, we have to talk."

"No, we don't!" I yelled "Leave me alone!"

"I want to help!"

"You can't help! No one can!"

"Please, open the door."

I shook my head.

"No."

"I won't move, I'll stay here until you open this door."

"Why you wanna help me?" I whispered, walking towards the door.

"Because you're my friend. And that's what friends do!"

"You saw me 4 times! How… we're not friends!"

"It doesn't matter if we saw each other 4 or a thousand times. I care about you."

"You.. do?"

"Yes, open the door."

I sighed and opened the door. When our eyes met, I melted.

He pushed me against his body for one hug.

Actually, the best hug I ever gad.

"You can count on me. Always."

I nodded, trying to stop crying.

"I'm here for you. We're friends, right?"

I smiled. In his arms, I felt really safe. More safe than ever.

And I needed someone like him.

"Finn, can we be friends?" I said weakly.

He smiled.


	5. First Kiss

**Rachel's POV**

He didn't pulled me away until I calmed down.

"Ready?" he murmured.

I looked up.

"For what?"

"To come back."

"I can't. I mean.. everyone must think I'm diva."

He rolled his eyes.

"You got nervous. We didn't expect..-

"I know."

"We can talk to Ryan if you want."

"No, I can do this. I have to."

"You don't, Rachel, you don't have to kiss me if you don't want to."

"When I accept to do this musical, I knew what to expect. If Ryan thinks we should kiss, we'll kiss then."

"Okay." He smile, all shy. "I thought you prefer to die than kiss me."

I laughed. The first time in months. He laughed with me.

"You silly, you're very handsome."

He blushed.

"So.. let's do it?"

I nodded and we came back to the stage.

"Hello, Rachel. I'm glad you decided to join us." Ryan crossed his arms.

"Ryan, she was nervous. She.. broke up with her boyfriend last week." Finn lied. "That's why she freaked out."

"Oh. But you can't do this, honey. Be professional."

"I know and I'm sorry. That won't happen again."

"Okay. We don't have time to waste, let's rehearsal."

We agreed and went to our places. The song started.

_I've been alone  
>Surrounded by darkness<br>I've seen how heartless  
>The world can be<em> – he took my hands

_I've seen you crying  
>You felt like it's hopeless<br>I'll always do my best  
>To make you see –<em> I sang.

_Baby, you're not alone  
>Cause you're here with me<br>And nothing's ever gonna bring us down  
>Cause nothing can keep me from lovin' you<br>And you know its true  
>It don't matter what'll come to be<br>Our love is all we need to make it through_ – we sang together and our voices were perfect. We completed each other.

_Now I know it ain't easy  
>But it ain't hard trying<br>Every time I see you smiling  
>And I feel you so close to me<br>Tell me_ – he smirked.

_Baby, you're not alone  
>Cause you're here with me<br>And nothing's ever gonna bring us down  
>Cause nothing can keep me from lovin' you<br>And you know its true  
>It don't matter what'll come to be<br>Our love is all we need to make it through_

We finished the song and then he put one hand on my back and the other one cupped my face. I was nervous and he knew it, so gave me a question look, asking for permission. I nodded and he leaned over me.

Our lips met and I opened my mouth, his tongue slipped in. my hand went to his neck, pushing him against me. I bit his lip and he smiled against my mouth.

We started to separate and then I remembered my lines.

"I… I'm sorry. I can't." and I ran away.

From the backstage, I heard everyone clapping. I came back and Ryan was smiling.

"Oh. My. God. It was the best duet I've ever seen! You two have more chemistry than Romeo and Juliet! Brad and Angelina!"

We looked at each other and smiled.

"And the kiss.. was so intimate. Perfect. Just flawless." He said. "Since I'm in a great mood, you can take a break. I'll stay here, helping with the costumes. After the lunch, we'll meet again."

"You wanna do something?" Finn said to me.

"What?" he surprised me.

"We can hang out, I don't want to be here, but I don't have anything to do."

"Me neither."

"It's kind of early to lunch. So we can sit and talk."

"Sounds good to me." I smiled.

We went to Central Park and sit in one bench.

"So, are you liking NYC?"

"How do you know I'm not from here?"

"You're too tan and too beautiful to be from NYC."

I blushed.

"I'm from LA."

"Cool. Why did you move?"

I froze. I couldn't tell him about Jesse. Nobody could know about it. It was too personal.

"I can't tell you."

"Oh, ok. I understand. But can you answer me one thing? There's a boy in this story?"

"I really don't want to talk about it. You should respect that."

He raised his eyebrows.

"Oh, sorry."

"Thanks."

"So.. I was thinking, we probably will go home really late and I'm worry."

"With what?" I crossed my arms in my chest.

"I don't want to happen anything to you. You know, robberies or rapes.."

_If he knew.._

"What I'm trying to say is simple. I can give you a ride to work and home until you buy a car."

It really caught me off guard, I didn't expect that.

"Only if you want to, of course." He said regretting his decision.

"I want." The words came off before I do anything.

He smiled.

"Okay then."

I nodded and I couldn't help myself from asking.

"Why did you do that?"

"Did what?"

"You lied to Ryan, I didn't have a boyfriend. Why did you say that?"

"Well.. I didn't know why you wan away and Ryan shouldn't be mad at you."

"I wanna thank you for doing that."

"Don't worry, I got your back." He laughed.

I really needed someone like that, I couldn't see it until I met Finn and let him come closer. I couldn't go though alone. I needed a friend.

Luckily, he was the one.

**The Finchel duet is "Not Alone" by Darren Criss (from AVPM) and I didn't use the whole version.**


	6. Big Night

**Finn's POV**

I opened my eyes and still couldn't believe. It was the opening night of the musical. We were working really hard, in the last week of rehearsals, we worked days and nights in the theater. _We were ready._

Ryan asked us to be there 4 hours before the show begin. I took a shower and had lunch. My phone biped and I saw it was a sms from Rachel.

"can u pick me up at 3? Xoxo"

I answered in the next minute.

"of course, see ya later"

We were getting along, becoming friends. Best friends, I think.

Quinn was also our friend. We were the 3 principal characters, so we spent a lot of time together.

They were the friends I needed. I was alone, anti-social, actually. It was hard to trust in other people. For me, it'd take time to let people break my walls, know me.

The only person I didn't care about this wall stuff was Rachel. When I saw her for the first time, in the audition, I felt connected to her. I've never felt in that way with anyone. And the tether was getting strong.

I went to her house and picked her up, then we went to the theater.

"Are you nervous?" he murmured.

"Yeah, I don't know if I can do it."

She took my hand and made me look at her.

"Finn, listen to me. You're good, really good. When I heard your voice, it changed me in some way, I think your voice is my favorite one…" she blushed.

"Really?" I whispered.

It made me happy, _really_ happy; she meant so much to me and know that I meant something to her.. it was really cool.

"And you're helping me. You have no idea how. But I wanna thank you."

She hugged me tightly and I felt her tears soaking my t-shirt.

"Don't cry, Rach. I'm here for you." I kissed the top of her head.

We stayed there, in silence. If felt so good to have her in my arms, so right.

Then we rehearsal a little bit and got dressed. Ryan told us that the tickets were sold out and it made me more nervous, but after what Rachel said to me, I was a little confident. Just a little.

We watched the people coming in and sitting.

Rachel, Quinn and I were standing now on our feet, looking at the floor. The curtains were closed, the musical would start in minutes.

"Break a leg, Quinn." Rachel smiled.

"Break a leg, Rachel."

She turned to me with her angelic smile.

"Break a leg."

"I lov- Break a leg." I faked a smile.

She looked down and I felt my heart tighten. I was about to tell Rachel I loved her, and honestly, it was something I didn't plain to tell. Because I just found out, looking at her in that moment, I knew it.

_I loved her._

That tether, that connection.. it was _pure love_.

How was I going to tell her? She was my best friend, but we never talked about her exes. I didn't know if she was in love with someone else.

It would kill me if she was.

The first melody started and the curtains were open.

_Here we go, show time._

**Rachel's POV**

The show was awesome. Perfect. Everyone stood on their feet to clap. It was _brilliant_.

When I went to the backstage, Ryan hugged me and I felt his tears. Proud tears. And mine rolled down my cheeks.

"Thank you Rachel. I've been waiting for so long for someone like you. Now the world will see how talent we are."

I nodded and sobbed a little.

"Rach?"

I turned around and Finn opened his arms. I bit my lip so hard and ran to him. We hugged, his fingers holding me tightly. I was so safe with him.

And I couldn't deny, the kisses were the best. Of all times. He put so many feelings in that moment and I felt so overwhelmed.

When he pulled me away, we smiled.

"So.. let's celebrate!" Quinn giggled, happily.

We went to one bar and drank a lot. Even I did, usually, I didn't drink, but I had reasons, after a few shots, I was.. happy.

Finn had his eyes closed, enjoying the feeling. I sit by his side and poked him.

"Finn?"

"Hmm?' his eyes were still closed.

"I just wanted to tell you that you were amazing. Really."

"Oh.." he opened his eyes and looked at me "Thanks, you were amazing too."

I blushed and bit my lip again.

"And the kisses.. were interesting. _Very _interesting."

"Do you think so?"

"Yes."

"But did you like it?"

I nodded.

"That's good, I liked it too."

"Oh, cool."

He handed me a drink and raised his glass.

"Let's make a toast?"

"Hm… okay."

"To.. us." He raised his eyebrow, giving me a look that made me shiver.

"To us."

We made the toast and drank the shots, but we never took our eyes from each other.

I was hot, he drinks were making me hot. He grabbed my hand and intertwined our fingers.

Unexpectedly, I brushed my other hand against his face.

"I want to kiss you so badly.." he whispered.

I choked and pulled myself from him.

"Oh."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean.. –

"No, don't worry. I'm not mad."

It was truth, I wasn't mad. Because I wanted to kiss him too. So fucking badly. I licked my lips, trying to forget that. He was my friend and co-worker.

But none of this convinced me, I looked at his lips and licked mine again unwittingly. I really didn't mean to did that, but when I did, he leaned over me and kissed me. He pushed me to his lap and I straddled him, his arousal becoming more evident every second.

My lips went to his neck and I heard his moan.

And it made me remember.

_Jesse. Rape. Boys. Kisses. Arousals._

I got up, scared, Finn looked at me, confused.

"What happened? Did I..-

"No, Finn. This is wrong, very wrong." I shook my head and shut my eyes. "I can't do this. I'm sorry."

He was speechless and I left.

This was so wrong. I shouldn't feel anything for him. **Anything.** We couldn't be together. **Never.**


	7. Pretend

**Finn's POV**

Rachel left and I was confused. What was wrong? We only kissed, it was.. pretty normal.

I tried to chase her, but when I went outside, she wasn't there. The party wasn't fun anymore for me, so I took my car and went home.

In the next day, I went to the theater and Rachel wasn't there, she arrived hours later and didn't even look at me.

_Great_, no we were what? Children? Teenagers? For God's sake, I was 20 and she was 19! We were adults. She'd have to confront me sometime. Well, at least I knew she'd have to kiss me.

_Ha._

But she didn't talk to me off stage for days, she even avoided to be in the same room with me for a long time.

She was pretending I didn't exist and denying to death the fact that we kissed.

And I was sure she liked it, otherwise she wouldn't be so disturbed. But either way, it broke my heart. I loved her and she didn't look me in the face. It kind of sucks when the person you love does that.

I didn't try to talk to her, if she didn't want to look or talk to me, it was her choice. But my choice was killing me, breaking me, I was damaged. I didn't know how long I could take it. Seeing her everyday every day hurt me more and her indifference cut me. Two months after the kiss and nothing happened.

I was sitting alone in the dressing-room that I shared with the boys, then I heard a knock.

"Come in." I said.

The door was open and Quinn came in. she pointed to the couch.

"Can I sit?"

"Sure."

She smiled and sits by my side.

"How are you doing?"

"I'm fine. I've been better."

"It's Rachel, isn't it?"

"What?" I frowned, pretending to be confused; I was so easy to read, I guess.

"Finn, I know you. I see you every day for almost 3 months, between rehearsals and shows, you're in love with Rachel."

I choked.

"What?"

"Don't lie." She gave me a nice look. "You're discrete, I just observe a lot. And the look that you have in your eyes when look at her.. it's love."

"How do you know?"

"I just do." She shrugged. "You love her, don't you?"

I sighed, she wouldn't tell anyone and she'd know if I lied. So I nodded.

"That's so cute!"

"But you can't tell anyone." I warned her.

"Oh. Ok. Your secret is safe with me."

"Thanks."

"But.. how long?"

"Since the first time I saw her. But I realized 2 months ago, in the opening night."

"Oh… you must be broken, huh?"

"Yes. We kissed in the bar, in that night, but she ran, saying she couldn't.. Since then, she doesn't talk to me.

"Whoa."

"Yeah, I love her so much, but she clearly doesn't feel the same. I'll get over her."

"But do you _want _to get over her?"

"No." I whispered so low that I thought Quinn didn't hear.

But she did and put her hand on my shoulder.

"You should tell her. Tonight, after the play, Finn, she might like you. You don't know."

"I don't know.."

"Trust me, do it. If she doesn't reciprocate, you an get over her. If you don't try, you'll imagine your whole life 'what if she loved me?' "

"Yeah.. you're right." I nodded. "Thanks Quinn, you're an awesome friend."

"Oh, I'm not." She blushed. "I care about you. And about Rachel. You two deserve to be happy, finchel would be a cute couple."

"Finchel?" I raised my eyebrows.

"Finn and Rachel." She giggled. "I know she loves you, because when you're not looking at her, she's looking at you."

She hugged me and I smiled. I'd tell Rachel I loved her later that night.

**Rachel's POV**

I was in the girls dressing room, listening my ipod, Quinn was supposed to meet me to rehearsal our duet, there were some parts that I didn't like, but she didn't show up. She was 20 minutes late and I gave up and stood. I need to walk a little bit.

I went outside and saw her car. She was running away from me? When I turned around and walked to get back to the dressing room, I passed by the boys' dressing room and the door was open, I heard some laughs. It made me curious and I looked into the room… and sawn Finn and Quinn laughing and smiling to each other.

My heart tightened and I felt the anger rising in my body, my blood heating up. I ran and locked myself in the bathroom. The memories hit me, the last time I did that, Finn was on the other side of the door.

Now, he was laughing with Quinn. _Ugh._

But.. why was I so mad? He didn't belong to me, I had no right to be upset.

After a few minutes, when I was sure I wouldn't cry, I got back to the dressing room. Quinn was there.

"Hey Rach."

I faked a smile. _Bitch._

She didn't try to talk to me again and I didn't care.

Hours later, the 3 of us were together, I was between them. How convenient.

"Rachel?"

Finn's voice startled me. We didn't talk for months, it was strange to hear him calling my name.

I tried to look indifferent when I looked up.

"Yes?"

"Do you want to hang out later? I need to talk to you."

His request took me by surprise, to be honest, but I found myself nodding.

"Okay." He smiled.

The curtains opened and the show started. I decided to reciprocate the enthusiasm in the kisses. He noticed it and liked a lot. I could tell.

_Take that, Fabray._

I went to the dressing room and changed my clothes, Finn was waiting me outside.

"Can we go?" I asked.

"Sure. Do you want to go somewhere specific?"

"No."

He didn't tell me anything else and we ended up in Central Park."

"Are you hungry?"

I shook my head and we sit on a bench.

"So…" I crossed my arms. "What do you wanted to tell me?"

"It's difficult.. I've never.. –

"Look, you're doing Quinn, I get it. I don't care."

He gasped.

"Excuse me?"

"I saw you two smiling and laughing today! Don't pretend, Finn."

"Pretend? I'm not pretending!"

"I didn't know that's the way they're calling it now."

He rolled his eyes.

"I'm not _'doing it'_ Quinn."

"Don't lie!" I yelled. Then mumbled weakly: "I know things were weird between us, but I never thought you'd lie to me."

"I'm not lying to you." He whispered. "I never thought you'd thing that about me."


	8. Confessions

**Rachel's POV**

His voice broken and his face showed pain. Pure pain, his heart broke in front of me.

"I..

"Don't. I came here to tell you something important. But.. it doesn't matter."

"Tell me!"

"Why should I?" he frowned "You're and always were the mysterious one, never told anyone about parts of your past. Why should I tell you something?"

"Because..-

I stopped talking because he was right. I had no right to a=make him talk because I didn't.

"But why were you talking to Quinn?" I mumbled.

"It's not your business. But.. she was helping me with my feelings."

"With your feelings?"

"Yes. She was encouraging me to declare my love to someone."

I felt something breaking inside of me. _He was in love with someone_. In that moment, everything made sense. I was so jealous of Quinn because I didn't want her or any girl near him. _I_ wanted to be with him.

**I was in love with Finn. **I've never felt something so strong for anyone. He was a part of me and I wanted to be part of him too.

But I was too scared of being too close to a guy. Jesse left scars. Not physically, but in my psychological. He marked me.

"And.. that girl..-

"I don't want to talk about it, Rachel. It's not worth anymore."

"Why now?"

"Because she doesn't love me. She doesn't ever care about me."

She was crazy, right? It was impossible **not** to love him!

"You don't know that." It would kill me, but he needed to be happy.

"Can't you see what's happening?"

I shook my head and he took my hands.

"You're the weirdest girl I've ever know. In the first day, you were really rude, then we became best friends, after the opening night and the kiss, you ignored me, pretended I didn't exist. I was a stranger to you. And it broke me inside, every day."

My jaw dropped, he was vomiting words at me, it was too much to take.

"And I'm standing here, talking these things and you don't realize that.." he sighed. "You have no right to be mad. If Quinn and I were dating, you shouldn't care.

"But I do!" I yelled, shivering.

"Why?"

"Because I.." I shut my eyes.

"You what?" his tone rose.

"I love you! Are you happy now? I fucking love you, Mr. Finn Hudson!" I was crying, but I didn't care. I needed tell him.

"You what?" he whispered, surprised.

"I.. love you."

He smiled. What the hell?

"You love me?"

Ok, was he stupid? I just told him. I loved him, was he deaf?

"Yes."

"That's all I needed to hear." And kissed me.

Like never before. He was angry but anxious, it looked like we were dying or the time was running out.

I put my hands in his neck and pushed him against me, our tongues were doing a desperate dance.

I never wanted to let him go. His lips, his body.. it was all I wanted, all I needed.

But I got breathless and broke the kiss, he didn't pulled me away, his arms were holding me tightly.

"Wow."

"Yeah." He smiled.

"Thanks, I guess." I said, a little stunned. "But weren't you in love..-

"Gosh Rach, are you high?"

"No! of course not" I smacked his arm.

"Well, it looks like. Rachel Berry, I'm in love with **you**."

Ok, was this a joke? Because it wasn't fun. At all.

"Are you serious?"

"Of course I am."

I looked at his eyes. He wasn't lying. Oh my God. He loved me.

"I love you like never before. I just want **you**, other girls.. don't care at them, I care about you."

I smiled.

"That's so sweet.." I murmured.

I wanted him so badly. I loved him and he loved me, with a normal couple, it'd be enough. But unfortunately we weren't a normal couple.

"I want to be with you, Rach."

"I.. I can't."

He choked, surprised.

"You can't?"

I shook my head, crying again I've never done something so hard in my entire life. I loved him too much. So much that I needed to let him go. I couldn't make him happy.

So I'd rather to be miserable and let Finn be happy than be with him and make us unhappy.

It was a tough choice.

"Rachel, look at me." He pleaded.

"I can't."

"Yes, you can. Stop talking that." He lifted my jaw, making me look in his eyes.

"We love each other. It's enough."

"No, it isn't."

"Why?"

"I can't tell you."

"You can! Please tell me your secret, it's consuming you."

"Finn, I –

"Stop. Nothing that you can say will make me love you less. I love you. Trust me."

I closed my eyes and leaned my head in his chest and the tears were still there, I was sobbing. He rubbed his big hands in my back, whispering that everything would be fine.

I wished it was true.

"You know.. you don't have to tell me if you don't want." he whispered.

"I'd tell you, but in the second I do that.. it'll become more real."

"But –

"It's too hard, don't you get it? It's not a silly secret. It's one that will hunt me for the rest of my life!"

"C'mon, it can't be that hard." He said.

I pulled him and look with disbelief at his face.

"It can't be that hard?" I screamed, with hatred in my voice. "I was raped, Finn! Raped!"


	9. The Whole Story

**Finn's POV**

My jaw dropped and my eyes grew wide. She was raped. God.

"What?" I said, but my voice didn't come out very clearly.

"Are you happy now? The truth is finally out."

"Rachel, I'm so sorry."

"No. Just leave me alone."

She turned and walked off. I saw her taking the cab. I wanted to chase her, but her revelation caught me by surprise. I was motionless.

Everything was a puzzle and all the pieces were together now. She was so aggressive and mysterious because she was raped. God, I was so stupid! She was nervous now and traumatized. I had to go after her.

I ran to my car and went to her building. I was lucky to meet her at the door.

"Rachel!"

She looked at me and I walked toward her.

"What?"

"I'm sorry. I really am."

"I get it. Just leave –

"No, I can't leave you. I'm here for you. At least, as a friend." I took her hand "Let me help you."

"No one can."

"Let me hear you, then. You suffered for 3 months quiet, if you talk.."

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"You don't have to, okay? Just let me be with you, I can't let you alone now. I won't do anything."

"I don't know.."

"Please Rach. Let me help you."

She sighed and nodded. Then leaded me to her loft.

"Do you want a glass of wine?" she asked.

"No, thanks." I sit on the couch.

She went to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of wine and 2 glasses. She put it on the table and sits by my side. She drank her wine and took a deep breath.

"It happened 8 months ago." She whispered.

I looked up and realized she was going to tell me.

**Rachel's POV**

I decided to tell him, I trusted in him and he was right, it would help me, it would help me. It'd become more real, but this secret was killing me.

"Go on." He encouraged me.

I closed my eyes and imagined the situation.

_(Italic – flashback, Jesse's lines)_

"I lived with one friend, Mercedes, in LA. We had a calm life, we sang in bars and made little shows in the city, we were comfortable with our lives. But in one night.. we went home really late, after one show, when we got there.. one man showed up. It was kind of dark, but we could see his face, he had a gun and put it against my head. He said:

"_Hey baby, open the door."_

"I took my keys and opened. I thought he wanted to steal. He hit Mercedes with the gun and she felt. He tied my hands and feet and put some towel in my mouth. He took Mercedes to her room and raped her. It was quick and I didn't hear a thing.

"Then.. he came back. He ripped my clothes and threw the towel away. I tried to scream, but he pointed the gun to me again and murmured in my ear:

"_Don't scream or try to do anything or I'll kill you, bitch."_

"I shut my mouth and he kissed me. His lips were sweet, actually. And.. he raped me, brutally. He was really tough, making me bleed. When he finished, he hit me several times and when I was almost blacking out, he whispered to me:

"_You were the best, baby. So soft, so tight.. thanks for giving me the best sex I ever had."_

"And he hit me one more time and I passed out."

Finn was shocked and I was crying again. Telling him was making me live that rape again. And it hurt me. He squeezed my hand and I felt good. He was the only one who could make me feel that way.

"But.. what happened? Was he arrested?"

"Oh, yes. After a few hours, when Mercedes and I recovered our consciences, we went to the hospital and the police station, there we found out we weren't the only victims."

"Really?"

"Yes. He raped another 10 women. But they never could see his face clearly. With our help, we could.. get him."

"Oh, is he arrested now?"

"No, he's dead."

"Dead?" he choked.

"He was sentenced to a death penalty. I watched his execution, 5 months ago."

"Oh."

"It made me feel a better, seeing him dead, but I was afraid of everything and everyone."

"I understand that, of course you'd be afraid."

"When he died, I decided there was nothing more to do in LA. So I moved. Now everything makes sense, huh?"

He nodded and I drank another glass of wine.

"Hey, I'm sorry, you didn't deserve it."

"I think no one does."

"Yeah. But.. Rachel, I want to be with you. If you're not ready to do this, I'll get it, totally."

"I am.. I don't know, really. It's too much for me to handle right now."

He looked down.

"I don't wanna hurt you, baby." I cupped his face "But I'm too confused right now I have to think. I'm not enough."

"Don't say that ever again. You're enough, more than enough. I think you're too much for me.."

"Please, this is crap. You're enough for me. I'm.. afraid."

"Of what?"

"I don't know if one day I'll be able to give something more."

"Rachel, I don't want to be with you for sex. I love you and I'll wait. If you don't want to have sex ever, I'll understand."

OMG, he was the cutest boy ever. He was willing to give up having sex for a long time. For a 20 year old boy, it wasn't the easiest thing to do.

"Are you serious?"

"Yes."

"God, you're perfect."

He blushed.

"I'm confused but.. can I kiss you?"

He giggled and pushed me with his big hand. He brought his lips down to mine to a soft kiss. It started out sweet, but it intensified seconds later. We explored each other's mouth for minutes.

Then my lips went to his neck, I bit and shucked his skin.

"You're gonna left a mark." He moaned.

"That's the intention." I laughed.

He pushed me to his lap, I straddled him, I felt his erection pressing my core. Ok, I was so wet.

I marked him and kissed his lips again. His breathing sped up, his erection grew harder. He was the one who pulled me away.

"Gosh.."

"I know." I giggled "This kiss was fucking fantastic."

"You're cute even when curse."

I rolled my eyes.

"I'll let you think. But I want to be with you, remember that."

"Ok."

"And don't worry about making me unhappy. The only way you'll make me feel this way is leaving me. I love you, Rach." He said, reading my mind.

"I love you too, Finn."

He stood up and left with a smile on the face.


	10. Decisions

**Rachel's POV**

I was thanking it was Saturday; I'd see Finn on Monday night. I had a lot of time to think.

In my mind and heart, it was very clear what I wanted. What I was facing was more difficult.

I had to be sure that I could be a normal girlfriend. A good girlfriend for Finn, he deserved the best.

The rape changed me, before I had a lot of dates and had sex with a few people. Sex never was too much important to me, because I never had sex with the one I loved.

The first and only man I ever loved was Finn and I wasn't sure that I could give more than kisses. After Jesse, sex had a big deal.

But I loved Finn and I wanted to be with him.

Gosh, it was going to be difficult, I needed to think.

**Finn's POV**

I went home a little stunned with all the information.

Rachel loved me too, but she was raped. That could ruin any chances of being with me. And I wanted her more than anything.

If she decided to be with me, I'd be the happiest man alive and I'd work my whole life to make her the happiest human. But if she decided to.. say no to that, I'd understand.

It would break me, destroy me, but I had to understand.

I looked at the mirror and saw the hickey in my neck. I smiled remembering the kiss; it felt so good to have her lips on mine, her taste was so sweet. I felt my pants getting tighter. God, I couldn't deny, I wanted her in every single possible way.

By now.. I was sure my balls were blue. I was **too **excited.

_Focus, Finn. _I didn't know her decision, but in my heart.. I felt she'd take a chance on us.

And I was willing to do anything for her. _Anything. _Even not have sex. For the rest of my life. It would be hard because she was _smoking hot_, but if this is what she wanted or needed. I'd do.

We were meant to be together.

_Forever._

**Rachel' POV**

Sunday morning. I woke up a little dizzy, because of the wine. I ended up sleeping on the couch thinking of Finn.

I spent the day viewing our life together, how'd be. And I liked what I saw, really much. The two of us growing old together, having a amazing life..

That's what I wanted. It was so simple.

My insecurities were bothering me. But these plans, these future.. it was what I wanted.

I needed to try. I couldn't spent my whole life wondering 'what if?'. We loved each other and I'd make it be enough.

In the next night, I'd tell him my decision.

**Finn's POV**

I spent my Sunday thing about Rachel; then I went for a walk and had dinner in one restaurant near home. I slept early, I wasn't.. excited at all, I was going to see her in the next after noon and she didn't text or called me.

In the next day, I woke up with my phone buzzing. I took it from my nightstand and saw it was a message from her.

'_hey, don't pick me up, we'll meet at theater, I made my decision. Xo.'_

Ok, it was a good or a bad thing? _Great, _I was freaking out.

She made her decision, so by the end of the night, I'd be happy or really sad.

She didn't want me to pick her up, it wasn't good. I guess.

Shit, I was babbling thoughts in my own mind. I spent the day nervous, anxious. The time stopped, it felt like years.

But at last, it passed. I went to the theater and Rachel wasn't there yet.

_Okay Finn, breathe. _

"Finn!"

I turned to see Quinn coming in my direction.

"So? Did you talked to her?" she asked, excited.

"Yes."

"And?"

"She loves me too."

"Really?" she smiled "So are you together now?"

"Er.. no."

"No?" she frowned. "Why?"

I froze, I shouldn't tell her, should i? Rachel took to long to tell _me _that secret, it wasn't mine to share, so..

"She got nervous, she asked some time to think." I wasn't lying.

"Time? You love her and you..-

"Quinn, she needed to think. We're going to talk tonight, she made her decision." I cut her.

"Oh… ok. When she tells you her decision, tell me."

"Sure." I nodded.

She smiled and went to talk to someone. I was looking at the door, and then _she_ entered.

I couldn't help myself and smiled; she came to me and kissed me on the cheek. Fuck, it wasn't good.

"Hey." I said.

"Hello Finn. We'll talk after the musical, I came with a cab can you give me a lift?"

"Of course. Where do you want to go?"

"I don't know, but don't worry, I'll figure it out."

"Alright."

She was beautiful, as always. Her eyes weren't puffy, so she didn't cried. It made me happy, I didn't want her to cry. Or suffer.

"I'll see you later." She blew a kiss and left, I watched her sighing.

I went to the dressing room and slept for 1 hour, woke up and changed my clothes, then went to the stage, Quinn and Rachel were talking.

"Hey." I waved.

They smiled and we heard the audience clapping, the curtains were opening.

After the show, everybody was leaving and I was waiting for Rachel at the girls' dressing room door.

She showed up and smirked.

"Can we go?"

"Sure." I nodded and held out my hand.

It was a test, if she took it, I'd be a little relief, but if she didn't..

"I think we have to talk before do anything." She whispered.

Crap, she was going to break up with me. Even if we didn't started something official.

We went to my car and I said to her.

"Where are we going?"

"Can we go to one restaurant? Eat pizza, maybe? I'm hungry."

"Okay."

I drove to one pizzeria and we sit in one table in the corner, the waitress came quickly and wrote our orders.

"So.." I started as soon as the waitress left.

"Well, I made my decision. And please don't interrupt me, it will be difficult, but I'll open my heart."


	11. Together

**Rachel's POV**

I was about to tell him my decision, but I had to tell my reasons.

His face froze, but still looked carefully to my face, trying to read me.

_Breathe and talk, Rachel._

"Ok, I spent this whole time thinking about me, you, us. I think some neurons died." I smiled "Look Finn, I love you. More than myself or anything or anyone in this world. My biggest doubt wasn't if we should be together, because I know we should. My doubt is.. if I could be a good girlfriend. –

"Rach, of course you.. –

"Finn, baby. Please don't interrupt. I'll explain it all."

He didn't say anything more.

"We know what happened to me and it left scars. **Deep** scars. And I don't know if someday I'll make love to you. I know you don't care, but I don't want to take anything from you."

He opened his mouth to speak, but I raised my hand, making him stop.

"I don't care or didn't.." I sighed "About sex, I didn't imagine I'd fall in love and want something more..-

"Wait, did you imagined about me and you.. –

"Of course. I spent days thinking, everything crossed my mind. And I want it. Everything. I can't be happy without you. I just can't." he smiled, getting the message. "I can't say no to you and we have to try or I'll spend my life thinking how it would be. I can't promise anything, but I'll try to be the best girlfriend in the world. If you want, of course."

Finn took my hands and looked deep in my eyes.

"Are you kidding me? Of course I want it! Rachel, I love you so much and I promise to be the boyfriend you want. I won't push you to your limits, we can stop whenever you can."

"Baby, don't freak out!" I giggled. "We'll be okay."

"Yes we are." He stood up and bent down by my side. "Well.. I want to make it official. Rachel… do you want to be my girlfriend?"

I smiled. "It'd be a honor."

He cupped my face and I leaned to kiss him. It felt _right_. I knew he was the one and I made the right decision.

"I love you." He whispered.

"I love you too, baby."

He sits in front of me again and the waitress came minutes later with our pizza, we ate and he took me home.

"Do you want to come in?" I offered.

"I want, but.. I'm too tired." He made a grimace. "You are too, I can see it."

"Yes, I need to sleep, this musical is killing us."

He laughed and nodded.

"I'll call you tomorrow, okay? We can lunch together."

"Sounds good to me."

We kissed again and I went home, to sleep, with a huge smile on my face and my heart beating fast.

I was happy. Finally.

**Finn's POV**

After I left Rachel in her house, I went to mine. I was tired and needed to sleep.

I was relief, so fucking relief. She took a chance on us, she believed in us, like I did.

We'd work hard to make this relationship be perfect.

In the next morning, I picked her up in front of her building. Hs e received me with one kiss that took my breath away.

Great way to start the day.

"Well.. good morning to you too, baby."

She licked her lips and smirked.

"I'll sound cheesy, but I missed you."

Yes, I was a fool, one fool in love. She was everything for me, I've never felt this love, this.. need to be with someone, Rachel was perfect, flawless.

Let's say she bring my romantic side alive, I wanted to be whatever she wanted.

And I was kind of selfish, so it was a big deal.

"I missed you too, silly." She smiled.

"Where are we going nor, Mrs. Berry?"

"You can pick the place, Mr. Hudson. I already chose yesterday." She giggled.

Her laugh was contagious and so cute.

See? Romantic side talking.

"I don't care where we're going, I just want to go with you."

"You're perfect, I did mention that, didn't I?"

"Yes." It was my turn to giggle. "But I'm not."

"Ahn.. yes you are. But I want to make some questions."

"Go on."

"Are you… a virgin? Sorry for asking, but I was curious…" she blushed.

"Don't apologize, you're my girlfriend and can ask any question you want. But answering it, no I'm not virgin."

"Oh. That's.. good. I guess."

"Good?"

"Yeah, I didn't want you to die virgin, if I don't put out."

I rolled my eyes.

"Can you forget this for a minute? I'm okay with my decision, even if I was virgin, I wouldn't change my mind."

"Really?"

"Yes. And I consider myself a virgin, for your information"

"What do you mean?"

"I had sex with a lot of girls in high school, it was good, but it didn't mean nothing because I wasn't in love with them."

"Have you ever been in love?"

"No. have you?"

"Nope."

"And were you a virgin when..?" she understood the question.

I wasn't say his name, it'd bring memories and I wanted to forget this story and she wanted to do the same, I was sure.

"No, I had sex with some boys. In high school too. And after that."

"Oh, that's.. well, I don't know."

"Don't worry, we'll put this behind us. I feel safe with you. I always felt."

I smiled.

"You never mentioned that."

"I'm now. I didn't know what it meant, but I felt good and safe every time we were together. That's why I was so rude to you when we met. I was nervous, I haven't talk to anyone for that long since the rape, so it freaked me out."

"I thought you hated me."

"No, I never hated you. It's impossible to hate someone so cute and perfect like you."

I felt my cheeks redder.

"Let's go? She asked.

"Okay."

We went to the shopping I looked at her walking and holding my hand. I was so lucky.

And never been this happy before.

**Well, is this the end? No, not really! There's the epilogue, so don't miss it! Xo.**


	12. Next Step

**4 months later.**

**Rachel's POV**

I woke up a little late and looked to my side. Finn was still sleeping. I smiled and put my hand on the mouth to hide my laugh when he snored.

We.. were doing great. It was our 4 month anniversary, and we were happier than ever.

I have to admit that our relationship didn't please Ryan too much, but he got over it.

Quinn was really happy and called herself "the finchel cupid". But she was, so…

Finn was a gentleman, he took me on super cute dates.

When we celebrated out first anniversary together, I proposed one thing: we could sleep in each other's houses. He agreed happily. So we were doing it all the time since then.

I sit and tried to get up, but I felt one hand on my wrist. I looked back and he was smiling, sheepishly.

"Hey baby."

"Good morning, love." I leaned to kiss him.

His hands pushed me and I ended up straddling him. I bit his lip and went down to his neck, I felt his hands cupping my ass, making me moan. I knew my core was becoming warm and wet. He caused this reaction on me all the time.

We never saw each other naked or did anything… too sexual. We both knew it was killing him.. and me.

He didn't know, but in the last days, I was thinking about sex. I always thought how it would be. Finn wouldn't hurt me, physically or emotionally. And I wanted to make love to him. _That night._

I couldn't and wouldn't let Jesse ruin my life even dead. What he did was awful, but he was punished. I needed to move on and the only way to do it was having sex with somebody. And Finn was the one.

"Happy 4 month anniversary." He smirked.

"For you too, baby."

"What do you want to do tonight?"

"Let's go dinner and come back. See a movie.."

"Great idea." He sits and grabbed his shirt."

"Are you leaving?"

"Yeah.. I have to go. I promised my dad I'd have lunch with him."

"Oh. Ok."

"I can come here at 7, sounds good to you?"

I nodded, he kissed me one more time, whispered 'I love you' and left.

Yes, it was time to take the next step.

**Finn's POV**

I and Rachel were going back to her place, we had dinner and saw one musical on Broadway. I looked at her and noticed she was nervous.

"Baby, are you okay?"

"Yea." She mumbled.

I frowned, but didn't say anything else until we got to her home.

As soon as I closed the door, she pushed me against the wall.

"Whoa baby." I smiled. "Are you drunk?"

"No." she shook her head and kissed me.

My hands went to her waist, pushing her body against mine. She sucked my bottom lip and laughed.

"We should go to the bed." She whispered huskily.

I nodded and in a few seconds, she was pushing me to the bet with her, I was on top, her hair was spread all over the pillow.

"Finn?"

I looked deeply in her big brown eyes.

"I want… you make love with me."

I choked.

"Are you sure? I don't want you to feel pressure.. –

"Finn, we're a normal couple. And I want to feel you. _In me._" She moved her hips, creating a delicious friction. We moaned together.

"I.. I don't have a condom." I blushed.

Great. When she finally wants to do it, I didn't have a fucking condom.

"Baby, breath. I'm on the pill, don't worry."

"Re..-

"Yes, really. Now shut up and kiss me. I'm _really_ horny."

I giggled and kissed her again. While our tongues were dancing, her hands went to the hem of my shirt and broke the kiss quickly just to remove it.

Her taste was awesome, but I needed more. I removed her shirt and looked to her breasts, covered in a black bra.

"You're beautiful."

She blushed.

"Finn.." it came out as a moan, making my bulge in my pants grew even more.

My lips went to her collarbone and kissed and licked it, then went down to kiss her breasts, my hands opened her bra and I looked again in her eyes, asking quietly. She nodded and I opened, revealing her perfect boobs. I threw the bra on the floor. I lowered my mouth onto one of her peaks, I swirl my tongue around her nipple, my other hand went to her other breast, massaging it.

Her moans gave me courage and I gave the same treatment to the other one.

Then I saw her eyes were closed, she was enjoying the pleasure. My lips went further down and stopped in her belly. She nodded again, still with her eyes closed, her pants were with the other clothes seconds later.

Her lacy black panties made me even harder. Her body was breathtaking. I kissed her thighs and my fingers hooked under the waistband of her last clothe, she lifted her hips to help.

I had to kiss her one more time, making sure she was okay.

"You're.. perfect."

She smiled and I bit her lip. I placed my hand in her upper thigh and brushed my thumb against her clit, she moaned loudly.

"More." She begged.

My middle finger teased her entrance, making her moan again, and I slipped it in her heat.

_She was so tight._

Then, I added another one and started to pump in and out of her. She bucked hard against my hand.

Her hands pushed me by the scruff to kiss me, the kiss was angry and anxious.

She was getting closer, I could feel it.

"Finn.." she moaned against my mouth. "Right there!"

I sped up my movements and she began to close around me. I broke the kiss and watched her have her orgasm. I've never saw anything as perfect in my life.

I still worked my fingers in and out of her, gradually slowing as she rode out her orgasm. The only sound I could hear was her panting.

"Thanks." She smiled.

I licked my fingers dry, tasting her.

"We're not finished." I smirked.

I positioned myself between her legs, I felt the heat in my face.

I plugged my tongue in her, she threw her head back, my thrusts were fast, her nails were almost hurting my back.

My tongue went up to her clit, licking and swirling, her taste was awesome, perfect. I sucked it had and she dig her nails in me.

Her moans got loudly again and she murmured:

"Faster."

I obeyed and she had her second orgasm, I swallowed everything she gave me.

The room was silent until she calmed herself and broke the silence.

"It was.. amazing."

"Yeah.."

"Yeah.."

"What about you? No foreplays?" she frowned.

"No, I don't want it. Now. Believe me, it's hard to decline the offer, I imagined it so many times.." I lost myself in thoughts.

Her warm mouth around my cock, she giving me a blowjob… oh, God.

"But…" I forced myself to come back to reality again. Well.. I had a naked Rachel in front of me, I didn't need any fantasies. "I want you to feel safe, so tonight is your night."

"But.. I want to. You know…" she bit my earlobe and murmured: "Have you in my mouth."

I shuddered. This woman talking dirty was making me losing control.

She straddled me and her hands went to my belt and opened it. My erection thanked when she took my pants off. She raised one eyebrow when she saw my bulge.

"I have to confess I always imagined how you are." She cupped my erection.

I moaned and she smirked, I saw the lust in her eyes.

The next step was took off my boxers, she did quickly and..

"Wow."

"What?"

"It's.. huge."

I blushed.

"Thanks."

"Now.. come here. I have one thing to do."

**Rachel's POV**

When I asked, any doubts that still lingered on my mind disappear.

I loved him and he loved me. It was right.

I grabbed his erection and stroked a little bit, he closed his eyes and moaned. I darted out my tongue around his head, I felt his body shiver.

"Ok, FYI… I don't have a gag reflex."

He grunted and I put him in my mouth. He was so big, but I made some effort.

His hand went to my hair and bobbed my head up and down.

Seconds later, his body tensed up and grabbed me harder, then released his cum in my mouth.

I swallowed and licked my lips. He tasted really good.

"Baby, I'm sorry –

I shook my head and smiled.

"Don't worry. Now.. make love to me, Finn."

He nodded and positioned himself at the top.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

He entered slowly, at first, but then buried himself deeply inside of me.

Finn made sure I was okay, looking intensely in my eyes. When he saw it was all good, he started to move and I kissed him again, we found our rhythm very quickly. But I wanted more.

"Faster. Be rough."

Not Jesse's rough, but… Finn's rough.

He frowned.

"Rachel.. –

"Please. Faster."

He obeyed and I moaned. His hands pinched my nipples. I bit his lip and licked it.

Then one of his hands went between our bodies and rubbed his fingers in circles against my clit. I felt myself clenching around him. He was about to come too. I buried my face in his neck and bit his skin.

He gave his last thrusts and we came together.

_It was awesome._

We were breathless, trying to take a deep breath.

I squeezed his hand and he fell by my side.

"It was.. I don't know, there isn't an words to describe it."

"I know." I said.

"You are perfect. Thanks for.. being here."

"No, no. I have to thank you." I looked at him "You helped me. Without you, I still would be scared and traumatized. I love you, Finn. You changed me, bring me to life again."

"And you did the same with me. You gave me the joy, the happiness that I've never imagined to feel."

I smiled, trying not to cry. He was the man I needed, he helped me more than he knew or I could ever tell.

I was raped, yes. But now it didn't bother me anymore. I had a perfect man by my side and I knew he would do anything to help me.

"Rachel?"

"Hmmmm?"

"I love you. And I want you to know that I want to marry you someday."

I opened my mouth, in shock.

""Are you.. serious?"

"Yes. Someday, if you want, you'll be Rachel Hudson."

"I'd love to."

He smirked.

"Wait, were you proposing?"

He laughed and placed my hand in his heart.

"No. Well.. yes. My heart is yours; if you marry me. Don't worry, not now."

"I don't care. I want to marry you."

"Really?"

"We love each other, right? So.. what's the point of waiting? I think we should be engaged."

"Okay. So.. I'll propose in the right way. Get dress."

We got dress. And he bent in one knee.

"I don't have a ring, but I have my heart to give to you. It's yours since we met. I love you and I want you to be my wife. Forever. So Rachel Berry, will you marry me?"

I had tears in my eyes. His speech was flawless.

"Yes."

He stood up and kissed me. Then we made love again, and again, and again.

We belonged to each other. _Forever._


End file.
